Mindful Tipping
A gray cloud often looms over the question to tip or not to tip. If you do tip, how much is enough? And even with asking local businesses, there still lies a great area of personal discernment. Below is a little perspective for the tipping world, but will leave you to ultimately decide how to tip for delivery, food service, spa & salon personnel, housekeeping, and many other services that would be grateful for any kind gestures.
Can you put a percentage on generosity? I have friends who have intentionally tipped our server the amount of our bill. It was so fun to see the server's eyes widen in disbelief! Other friends have saved a specific amount to take along with them when they went out as a group to make the day of their server. It meant so much to her that she came back crying. She was a single mother who wasn't sure where her rent money was coming from. The group of men she served had no idea of her struggles. Some credit card options give you the option to give a dollar amount or 10-20%. Some restaurants have a mandatory percentage with groups of a certain size. According to sources I've found online 20% of the value is a general rule of thumb for salons, restaurants, etc. If you're using a coupon, Groupon or other discount it's thoughtful to tip on the valued amount, rather than amount paid. If you have inconvenienced the salon with a last minute appointment request, ran late, special TLC given, it's thoughtful of you to give a higher percentage, but it definitely is personal how much you decide to give.
There are certain industries, such as the medical field, where monetary compensation is not allowed. You can generally still give thank you notes, small token gifts, wrapped chocolates, pens, etc. Find out what those serving you value. For those serving, thank you for all you do! Know that the intention of those leaving you a tip is to bless you. It seems to me as if the heart of tipping in our culture is generosity and goodwill towards those serving. How can I be generous with the resources I have?
I still remember the first tip I ever got and who it was from! My parents served meals in our home from the time I was 9 years old until I was in my mid-twenties. We would set the table with blue granite dishes, a small cutting board made by our Amish neighbor in the left corner, with an individual loaf of homemade bread and a wood-handled steak knife to cut the bread, a Hershey’s chocolate hug and kiss next, mason jar drinking glasses on the top right corner above the plate, and a blue dish cloth napkin pulled through a metal quilt basket-shaped napkin ring on the plate. We helped bake the individual loaves of bread, peel the potatoes for the mashed potatoes, cut up broccoli for the broccoli salad, etc in preparation to welcome our guests. When they arrived, we served the food, refilled water and coffee, bussed the dishes, served dessert, poured more water and coffee refills. Sometimes we would sing and give a short program, give pony cart rides, then bid our guests a safe trip home and “come see us again!” It was a full days work, but we always felt so excited to see those stacks of quarters or dollar bills on the tables when clearing the remains of the food and plates off the tables. It made us feel so valued and we looked forward to welcoming those same guests back again the next time they came! The mountains of dishes, trips to the barn with the leftovers didn’t seem quite so daunting with the incentive of having some money to spend. One gentleman even taught us how to make origami bow ties out of bills he gave each of us. Thank you for joining me on my trip down memory lane!
Article by Heather Joy Kemp